Sweets and true love

It is that time of year again!

Last Friday I had to venture to Target, in between dropping Abi off at soccer practice, and it was a madhouse with tons of men scrambling to find a card or Valentine's Day bag or wrapping paper with hearts or just anything red that they could pass off as Valentine's themed to prove they did not wait until the last minute!!

Poor fellas.  

Aaron and I have always agreed that Valentine's Day is a commercialized, silly "holiday", even from the very beginning of our relationship.  We have never put too much emphasis on buying each other expensive presents or making each other feel guilty if the other purchased a card last minute, because we both have done that!  In our house it is celebrated as just another day to express our love for each other and our children.

For example, this past weekend we spent Valentine's Day in one of our favorite ways: sleeping in until 7:30 (yay!), a bitingly cold first soccer game of the spring season, lunch after at Big View Diner, afternoon naps (aka mom folds laundry while Bray naps and Aaron plays Call of Duty), and then an end-of-season basketball party with some of our closest friends.

There was no big spectacular display of declared love, only simple acts all weekend to show that everyday can be February 14.  We did exchange gifts, but more as an excuse to buy each other something, because we never buy things for ourselves; Aaron has worn the same workout clothes since he was 20 and I have not had a case on my new iPhone that can withstand the torture of a 21 month old since I got it last year.  Friday night was pizza, Saturday night was appetizer potluck at the Montgomery's, and Sunday was one of Aaron's favorite meals of steak, bacon wrapped asparagus, and quinoa (trying something new). Then, one of his all-time go-to desserts, a "poor man's cobbler" with fresh blackberries and vanilla ice cream.  He even suggested we pick out an adult movie at Redbox, and by adult I mean Fury with Brad Pitt.  He tends to shy away from the dramatic and goes more for the stupid comedy, so this was a big deal.

The point is, I think as a society we, and more specifically women, put way too much emphasis on romanticizing Valentine's Day and making a gigantic spectacle out of it.  Is it more important to show your loved one that same, true love throughout the year, or bottle it up until the specified day of February 14?  And if you set your expectations way too high, you are only disappointed.

Ladies, we set our men up to fail.  They are not wired the way we are, noting there are always exceptions.  We think in terms of The Notebook and men think in terms of Tim "the Tool Man" Taylor from Home Improvement. Most of them do not sit around dreaming up ways to express their love, they do not sit and talk with their friends about what they hope their lady is getting them for Valentine's Day.  No, I have seen my husband's group messages.  They laugh about farts, random things they pull out of the air, deer meat that looks like gross body parts, the corhole boards they are building, and who can help them change their oil this weekend.

Maybe we should work more on expressing our love for one another by letting God's love shine through us.  I chose to do so by giving of my time, paying attention, being a friend, listening and showing my husband the respect he desires.  I for one would go for that over some flowers that will die in a few days!  Although, if I am honest, I will take an excuse to bake sweets any day!

True love originated when the Father sent His only son, to die in our place, so that we may live with Him in eternity.  And He did not do so because we deserve it, or we have done anything at all to remotely earn a place in His kingdom.  He did so out of love for each and every one of us.  

So, I hope you all had a wonderful February 14, and stay warm!

As promised, day #1

Well!  Day #1 proved to be a success, sort of.

I increased my fluid intake, which is hard.  It amazes me how some of our heart failure patients have such a difficult time restricting themselves to 2000 ml per day when I find it hard to meet my minimum requirements!  I have a feeling it is more a matter of, "you only want it when you are told you can not have it".  Anyway, I reached my goal of 64 ounces yesterday, woo hoo!

Dinner went well, also.  I found some fabulous recipes, which I have pinned to my Pinterest board, and you can find it here.  We grilled honey mustard chicken, baked garlic smashed potatoes and oven roasted parmesan zucchini.  It was a wonderful dinner!  I am not big on taking food pictures, plus, the websites for the original recipes have great photos.

My only hiccup came with my first official "workout".  Being pregnant and not particularly active before pregnancy, I am approaching this with low-intensity in mind.  I found a wonderful pilates workout online:

There are five 10-minute workouts targeting different areas.  However, when I got to the core section I realized I am going to have to modify a lot of what I will do.  You see, not having ever really focused on being physically fit, I have had no core strength.  Unfortunately, having children, gaining all the weight I did the first time, and not working on rehabbing my abdominal muscles, I have been left with diastasis recti, meaning there is separation in the rectus abdominis muscles.  Anyone can suffer from this, not just pregnant women/postnatal moms.  My dad actually has developed diastasis, as he has carried his excess weight in his abdomen.  If you are lying on your back, place your hand on your belly, close to your navel.  If you raise your upper body into a crunch position, you can feel the right and left sides of the rectus abdominis.  If there is a space, or even a bulge like I have currently, BINGO!  The varying degrees depend on fingertip widths you can fit into the space.

There are so many exercises that those with diastasis recti should avoid!  I am just really beginning my research on it, but will work hard to bring you safe options if you have found that you have this issue also.

Remember, beauty is not defined by one person and it must be felt inward before it can be felt outward!  God made you exactly the way HE meant to!

Good luck!

Pregnancy, fitness and all those Valentine's hearts

Ok, think about pregnancy fitness. Ugh.  Just saying it out loud makes me wince.  Such a terrible pairing of two words.  Seems like an oxymoron to me.

Each of my pregnancies has been so different.  With Abi, I was 18 and 97 pounds and before that had eaten anything and everything I wanted with reckless abandon.  I walked in to give birth to her and weighed in at 148.  51 extra pounds! That is a 10 year old!  With Brayden, it had been eight years since I had carried a child full-term.  My body had time to recover from what I put it through while carrying Abi and I did better with a 27 pound weight gain.  Now, a mere two years later (and 10 years since my first pregnancy), I am finding that my body has "settled" faster.  It seems it remembers being pregnant and my abdominal muscles are much weaker.  I can tell bouncing back after this one is going to take a lot more work.

I do not technically eat terribly, but there is definitely room for improvement.  And by eating better I do not mean counting calories like a madman, weighing out portions with a scale, or obsessively avoiding anything with sugar, or carbs, or sodium, or flavor.  I mean eating better and being smart, in general; portion control, listening to my body when it says I am full, eating well balanced meals, incorporating fresh fruits and veggies into every meal, minimizing the fast food, fried foods, processed foods, etc.

I am finding it hard to climb a few flights of stairs, which I know is partly because I am 24 weeks pregnant, but still, I was having a hard time way before now.  It is taking much longer for my heart to recover after climbing the stairs at work.  I have zero flexibility and my hips cramp up if I get into the wrong position, not always at the most opportune time....

Now, switch gears and think about heart health.  According to Go Red For Women, heart disease is the number one killer of women and one in three women die of heart disease and stroke each year.  Those are staggering statistics ladies!

So, in honor of heart health month, I am beginning this journey to better myself by becoming more physically fit, nutritionally aware, and hopefully encouraging a few of you.  I will share with you some of what I am doing to be active and any good recipes I have made my guinea pigs at home try.

I think it is important to note here that I do not think physical fitness is determined by the number on the scale or even what you see in the mirror.  I may be petite but I can bet there are thousands of women who weigh 30+ pounds more than I do who are much more physically fit.  Beauty is not defined by any one person, any weight or any body type/size; it is found within before it can be felt outwardly.

Stay tuned!

{24 weeks}

So, here we are! 24 weeks today. I have to say, it feels like this pregnancy has flown by.  Yet, on the other hand, I remember each week earlier on, because each week came it a new experience.

Week 14- our first trip to Colombus Isle together (alone, at last!)
Week 15- our first trip to the Emergency Room with Brayden
Week 16- our first flu, experienced as a whole household
Week 17- my first time EVER not seeing my mom on Christmas
Week 18- Aaron's first time throwing up with the kids in the house and mommy was at work (Nana to the rescue)
Week 29- Mom's (successful) 50th birthday surprise party
Week 21- our daughter left single digits behind :(

It has been a busy few months!

We have decided NOT to find out the sex of this child, which is a first for us also. It is very exciting, but it has driven our other family members crazy!  The fun is in the guessing.  I honestly can not tell. I thought it was a girl based on how my body responded in the beginning.  I felt I was spreading rather than popping out, however, I recently reminded myself that there were only two years between this pregnancy and the last, but eight years between Abi and Brayden.  I do not think I realized the extra ten pounds I kept from Brayden had actually settled in my hips, ha!  However, my body has take on the same shape as when I was pregnant with Bray and this baby moves almost as much as he did.  Abi napped all day and moved around when I tried to go to sleep at night.

There are not any specific cravings, per se.  Now that I am finally through the first trimester and we are all done being sick, I am able to eat pretty much anything.  I have managed to keep my weight gain so far to less than ten pounds!  But, with 16 weeks to go, we will see how I do.

If you have not seen me in a month or so, my belly sure has "popped".  All of the sudden, I am pregnant!  I am at that point where people can safely ask, "Are you pregnant?" and not think, "Well, she just ate a huge cheese burger..."

Here is the belly today:

Baby #3 will be here before we know it!

January 27

For the first time in over three years our lives passed through January 27 like any other day.

I woke up like any other morning, having just worked two 12-hr shifts; took Abi to school, played with Brayden all morning, nap time, lunch time, picked Abi up, dinner time, bed time.

It was not until yesterday that I remembered the anniversary had just passed.  When the realization came, a twinge of guilt came with it, because I had forgotten.

Anyone who has known me for any amount of time, knows that I have two beautiful children, and one due at the end of May.  I love them with everything in me.  Those who know me on a deeper, closer level, know that in January 2012, Abi accompanied me to a regularly scheduled doctor's appointment; I was 11 weeks pregnant and we were supposed to hear the baby's heartbeat for the first time.  Only, there was none.  An ultrasound would confirm that our baby had not grown past seven weeks and the next day a simple procedure would officially end my pregnancy.


And here we are, three years later.  How did I move through this day, without a thought? How did I forget?  I felt that in my forgetting this anniversary, it was as if it had never happened, that I did not care as much as I should have.  How could I have forgotten such a traumatic event in our lives?

And then I remembered. Our movement through the stages of grief is only made possible through Him.  I had not forgotten because it did not matter, my Comforter had allowed me to move through the grief of remembering that day and focus on who mattered presently; Aaron, Abi, Brayden and this life yet to be born.  I had not forgotten because I did not care, I had simply healed to a point where my grief was not the focal point of the entire day. 

Experiencing a loss of any kind- parent, spouse, child, friend, even pet- is felt in so many ways.  Grief is a complex monster.  It is not merely experienced emotionally, but physically and mentally.  It can consume you if you let it.  

But there is One who suffers our grief with us, who feels our pain and longs to heal our wounds.
"Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God."  


2 Corinthians 1: 3-4 (NIV)

Let Him in, let Him comfort you, let Him heal you.  

I'm so pregnant!

I know, I know. I should be doing something productive; working out, doing laundry, washing a dish that I am positive is in the sink, cleaning out the office aka new baby's room....

Instead, I found this video on by What's Up Moms. Enjoy!!

There are so many wonderful things about pregnancy, you are literally growing another human being inside of you. Take a second and just think about that....whoa.  However, with the unspeakable joy that comes from this process, there are the not so glamorous parts, too. We have to be able to poke fun at ourselves ladies; if you don't laugh, you might cry!